Unless you've been living alone on a desert island with no communication, you know that we've experienced recently a spate of public figures who have virtually lost their careers because of inappropriate statements that became public knowledge. If only they had received divine guidance in how to manage their personal public relations, they might still be enjoying their successful careers. The author has recently discovered an ancient scroll with ten sacred commandments that can ensure that the reader will avoid these public relations pitfalls.

1. Thou shalt think – and think clearly and carefully – before thou speaketh or writeth.

2. Thou shalt not write or say anything (that is, ANYTHING) that thou wouldst not be proud to see quoted in the media.

3. Thou shalt never say or write anything that is “off the record,” since thou knowest that in today’s world, NOTHING is off the record.

4. Thou shalt avoid jokes and trying to be “funny” or “cute,” since thou knowest that most humor has a hostile and sarcastic element. Thou shalt leavest the humor to the professional comedians and comedy writers.

5. In whatever thou sayest and writest, thou shalt ask, “How would someone who hates me interpret this?”

6. Thou shalt keep things positive, and avoid the negatives.

7. Thou shalt not insult any specific individual or group.

8. Thou shalt avoid the temptation to say something controversial, or to offer an “off the cuff” opinion about anything controversial.

9. Thou shalt offer opinions only within one’s own areas of knowledge, competence, and experience.

10. When in doubt about what to say or write, thou shalt consult.

The author is not certain which ancient public relations firm wrote the above ten commandments. However, their relevance for today's world is unquestioned.